Woman sitting enjoying a book to improve her well-being
Posted inWell-Being

5 Recommended Reads to Help Improve Your Well-Being

There’s nothing quite like losing yourself in a good book.  Especially if that book has been written with increasing your well-being at its heart.  

My own well-being journey has involved implementing plenty of helpful & insightful tips learnt through reading such books.  It would definitely be fair to say I have my own little well-being library – although I’m waiting on my husband to put up the bookshelves!  Still, I keep them close by as they’re great to dip in and out of.  

At times, certain parts might not apply to me but it’s a comfort to know they’re there when my journey takes an unexpected path or I’m in need of a moment of reassurance.  

With this in mind, I wanted to share 5 of my favourite well-being books, in the hope they’ll provide you with as much insight and increased well-being as they have offered me.  

5 Recommended Books to Improve Your Well-Being

Celebrating World Gratitude Day suggested activity
Posted inWell-Being

3-Ways to Use Gratitude to Increase Your Well-being

Truth time: I had never heard of World Gratitude Day before.  However, it’s a genuine day celebrated each year on September 21st.  

What is World Gratitude Day?  It’s a day dedicated to being thankful.

As you may know, I’m a big advocate of gratitude and firmly believe in its positive effect on well-being.  I’ve personally used all of the activities I’m sharing with you, and the first one helped me during a particularly difficult time in my life.  Truly, it was what kept me going, and I’ve continued with it ever since.

RELATED: Why Practising Gratitude Increases Your Happiness 

The founders of World Gratitude Day also recognise that making time for gratitude, appreciation & positive reflection improves our well-being and makes us happier, more contented people1.

So, in honour of World Gratitude Day, I’m sharing 3 powerful activities to kickstart (or enhance) your gratitude practice and help you move forward on your journey to living happier! 

3-Ways to Use Gratitude to Increase Your Well-being

How to Use Signature Strength to Feel Happier
Posted inWell-Being

How to Discover & Use Your Signature Strengths to Feel Happier

One of the first activities I had to complete on my well-being course was a questionnaire designed to identify my signature strengths.  It was explained to me that I would need to use this information as part of a weekly challenge designed to increase my happiness levels.  

Understanding my own personal strengths was not something I had considered as a way to feel happier.  ‘So what?’, I thought.  ‘I work out what I’m good at, pat myself on the back and carry on as usual – what does knowing this information really add?’  

Luckily, I allowed myself to be more open-minded because as it turns out a lot of research has gone into this area with pleasingly positive outcomes.  And thankfully, I too had a positive experience undertaking the activity, which is why I’d like to share it with you here.  

Before we look at why knowing your signature strengths is helpful, how to go about learning what yours are and ultimately, how to use them to feel happier, let’s first understand…

5 Things to Try to Help You Feel Less Anxious
Posted inWell-Being

5 Things to Try to Help You Feel Less Anxious

Mental health isn’t something I tend to write about, not because I don’t see it as valuable or something that needs to be discussed, but more because I view it seriously and haven’t felt qualified to give advice.  

However, I’m a person prone to anxiety.  Not a little spot of anxiety every-so-often but the type of full-blown panic attack, heart palpitation anxiety that has been known to leave me as a big sobbing heap on the floor.  

This pandemic hasn’t been helpful in making us feel less anxious either has it?  

A number of people have spoken with me either about their own experiences or experiences of friends and loved ones.  And it made me realise that perhaps I do have something helpful to say.  Absolutely not as a medical professional, but simply as someone who can relate to people who experience anxiety too.  After all, we’re really not alone in our experience, even if it feels like we presently are.  

I also understand that the majority of the suggestions I’m making here are already widely recognised and so for some, what I’m saying is nothing new.  Although, I do believe that sometimes – especially when you’re anxious – you need to hear a message a fair few times before a spark of ‘maybe I should try that’ is ignited.  

With all that being acknowledged, here are 5 things to try to help you feel less anxious…

I love me!
Posted inWell-Being

How to truly love yourself (in a non-self-centred way)

How to truly love yourself!  Sounds a bit self-centred, doesn’t it?  It makes me picture myself standing on a table in a middle of a crowded room shouting ‘I love myself’ and receiving the response ‘Wow what an ego, how did she fit her head through the door’ before the crowd erupts into laughter and general trolling.  

OK, maybe that’s a bit extreme but I guess we as a society (and perhaps especially we as women) are pre-disposed to feel uncomfortable making any type of self-love declaration.  

And look, the type of ‘love yourself’ I’m advocating here isn’t a request for you to stand on a table declaring it – plus how ‘crowded’ are rooms nowadays anyway!  It’s more of an encouragement for building a better relationship with yourself – cultivating a healthy and empowering appreciation, sounds reasonable, doesn’t it!

It’s about accepting yourself, realising your worth and acting with complete self-respect. 

It’s really not about arrogance, narcissism or negative self-inflation, more feeling good about who you are and how you operate. 

I’m guessing, you could love yourself a lot more – I know I could certainly learn to love myself a lot more too!  We’ve no doubt spent many years learning to un-love ourselves and it’s time to take action to reverse that process for good.  

Here are 8-steps you can take to help love yourself more:

Self Care Tips 5 Ways to Make Self-Care More Effective
Posted inWell-Being

5 Ways to Make Self-Care More Effective

Everyone’s talking about self-care nowadays, aren’t they?  Sharing their self-care tips & ideas.  To be honest, I’m all for it.  Self-care is a fundamental component of increased well-being.  It’s essentially a way of making time to care for ourselves.  And I’m sure you don’t need me to tell you the damage that can be done – emotionally and physically – if we allow ourselves to burn-out.  

So today, I wanted to share with you my own self-care tips.  Tips to make any self-care practice you undertake more effective.  These tips don’t require any additional effort or cost to implement, which is what I’d call a double-win for your well-being! 

5 Ways to Make Self-Care More Effective

How to feel happier when using social media
Posted inWell-Being

How to Feel Happier When Using Social Media

Social media is both a blessing and a curse.  It has provided us with a free way to connect & share, to promote & educate, to create community and to be well, social.  But there is a negative side.  It can be divisive.  It can leave us feeling inadequate and unhappy.  And actually potentially more disconnected and alone than we did before we even downloaded one of the apps. 

The platforms themselves have been designed to become addictive to us.  Many apps have implemented a ‘reward’ pattern (post something, receive praise in the form of likes, follows, comments, shares) in order to keep you as engaged as possible.  It’s a dopamine hit for our brains and we keep coming back for more.  Really we need to pause and examine the true cost to ourselves and our well-being.

As humans we have a fundamental drive to compare ourselves with others. 

It’s known as social comparison and we can’t help ourselves – it’s just something we naturally do.  How we believe we fare when we make those comparisons directly affects our self-esteem.  And if you hadn’t already guessed, social media platforms are virtual breeding grounds for social comparison.

A 2014 study by Vogel & colleagues concluded social comparison on Facebook had a significant negative impact on participants self-esteem.  Interestingly, even when the participants were comparing themselves to people who were relatively worse-off than them, their self-esteem levels didn’t increase, they just stayed the same.  In effect, there was zero positive impact on their self-esteem when using Facebook.  Quite revealing findings, right?!

The best advice anyone can offer you when it comes to social media is to delete the apps. 

There you go I’ve said it!  I understand that’s a controversial statement, but the evidence is weighted in favour of this.  It is better for your well-being not to use them.  However, I appreciate that for many this won’t seem like a viable option (myself included!) so thankfully, there are a few things you can do to look after your well-being whilst using social media and I’m going to share them with you now.  

5 Ways to Feel Happier When Using Social Media:

25 Inspirational quotes to uplift you
Posted inWell-Being

25 Inspirational quotes to uplift you

Inspirational quotes are brilliant! Especially when these pearls of wisdom speak to you at exactly the right time. I personally find them very powerful in boosting my mood & uplifting me. There’s something comforting to know you’re not alone in your experience, that someone has been, survived & most likely thrived regardless. It provides hope, doesn’t it?

I’ve been sharing inspirational quotes from the very beginning of Living.Pretty.Happy – I hope to be known for a few of my own one day! Anyway, I usually share these on social media, but I wanted to pull them together here and give some of my favourite inspirational quotes a permanent home.

As a side note, I haven’t elaborated on any of them as I believe meanings are personal and completely open to your own interpretation – that’s the beauty of them, isn’t it? I hope they inspire & uplift you, as much as they have me!

25 Inspirational quotes to uplift you

How to make a habit stick
Posted inPersonal Growth Well-Being

How to make a habit stick

My work often leads me to learn simple yet proven techniques to help improve my sense of well-being.  Things like good nutrition, regular exercise, meditation, journaling to name but a few.  All valuable practices to adopt, but even with this knowledge (and the best of intentions) I still find I can struggle to change my behaviour in certain areas.  Which is frustrating because I know what I need to do, so why can’t I just go ahead and do it already or at least do it with some consistency? 

Laurie Santos, a professor at Yale University describes this as the G.I Joe fallacy: “the mistaken idea that ‘knowing’ is enough to change behaviour”.  In actuality, to change our behaviour, we have to change our habits.  Which is easier said than done really, isn’t it?  

But all is not lost… 

At the moment I’m undertaking a course on well-being (run by Laurie), part of which involves actively trying to incorporate a specific wellness activity into my life, giving me the best chance to build it into a productive habit. 

I’ve definitely benefited from the tips & techniques I’ve acquired as part of this and I want to share them with you now.  So if you’re ready to convert a good intention into an established good habit, read on!

How to make a habit stick

Partnered for success, how an accountability partner can help you to succeed
Posted inPersonal Growth Well-Being

Partnered for success: How an accountability partner can help you to succeed

I’ve just entered into a new partnership!  One that I’m pleased to say my husband is quite open to – well mainly because it has nothing to do with our marriage, and everything to do with my success.  Yes, I have gone and got myself an accountability partner.  

What is an accountability partner, you ask?

It’s somebody who helps you fulfil a goal through regular meetings to check your progress.  It’s a reciprocal, committed partnership, based on trust & a shared drive to succeed.  

And why is it such a great idea?

5 Ways to be braver
Posted inPersonal Growth Well-Being

5 Ways to be braver

For my birthday this month, I’ve decided to give myself a gift that will mean something to me.  Although I have written myself an actual birthday list, this particular gift can’t be purchased in a store.  Starting in this new year of my life, I want to be braver and therefore, I would like to give myself the gift of courage.

This doesn’t mean I want to turn myself into a superhero or head out to do crazy death-defying feats.  It also doesn’t mean I’m currently a quivering mass scared of my own shadow.  Ideally, it just means finding the courage to release the fears currently holding me back & developing the confidence to step-up, when I’d usually shy away.

I truly believe courage can be cultivated 

What I learnt about happiness from a Buddhist monk
Posted inWell-Being

What I learnt about happiness from a Buddhist monk

Gelong Thubten wasn’t exactly who I was expecting when I sat to listen to a Buddhist monk speak about happiness.  

In my mind, monks were quiet, unassuming and dare I say it, non-relatable.  Yet, here was a man full of presence & personality – who 25-years previously had been an actor living a wild & excessive lifestyle in New York.

And whilst he did have the shaved head & clothes of a Buddhist monk, that was where my ill-conceived stereotype ended. He was in fact very relatable. Not that I’m saying I can personally relate to living a wild & excessive lifestyle in New York but more that he seemed to get life.  To get the demands & challenges.  To understand what it’s like to feel unhappy or unfilled.  

When he spoke he didn’t look down from a pedestal of righteousness, more embraced you in a compassionate hug with his words.  I knew this was someone who would be able to teach me a thing or two.  

In fact, I have learnt a lot from him.  I’ve heard him speak twice now, took part in a guided meditation led by him and read his book – A Monk’s Guide to Happiness*.  

Although he’s taught me more than I have room here to share (believe me, I am really condensing his teaching here), these are just some of the key things this particular Buddhist monk has to say about happiness…

5 Simple Activities to help you feel happier
Posted inWell-Being

5 Simple activities to help you feel happier

At the moment, emotions can be akin to riding a rollercoaster – am I right? 

Anyway, to help combat the lows there are some simple, but effective ways to maintain some balance and hopefully make the ride slightly less daunting.  

Let me share with you 5 simple activities you can try to help you feel happier…

Maintaining mental well-being during lockdown
Posted inWell-Being

Why it’s OK to go easy on yourself

Last Friday I created & posted this to my social media accounts:

Positive affirmation that encourages mental well-being through self-compassion #positiveaffirmations #selfcare

It’s a message I’ve always felt strongly about – I’ve written about self-compassion & the importance of being kind to yourself before – and with everything currently going on, I am compelled to highlight it again.

You see, I applaud anyone who is seeking the positive from this situation.  If you’re using lockdown as an opportunity to get fit, write a novel, try new things, that is brilliant.  Keep going! 

But recently there seems to be unspoken pressure that if you’re not following suit and being your most productive, you’re in someway failing.  Please let me assure you, you are not.  

I do believe we are all capable of amazing things regardless of the circumstances.

70+ Positive Affirmations Great for use anytime & anywhere
Posted inWell-Being

Positive Affirmations For Use Anytime & Anywhere

Every Monday morning at 7am (London, UK time), I post a series of positive affirmations across all of my social media channels, under the #MondayMantras.

If you’re new to using affirmations, I recommend you take a moment to read: How Can Affirmations Help You (& How to Make Sure They Do).

Essentially though, affirmations have the ability to override negative thinking patterns and bring us into a more positive frame of mind. Which is why I post them regularly with the intention of helping you kickstart your week positively!

Even though I post on a Monday morning, these affirmations can be used at any time – they’re great on any day ending in a ‘y’ to be honest! I’m also aware that not every one of my readers uses social media and won’t have access to them.

So, current climate as it is, I wanted to create a page on Living.Pretty.Happy to be updated weekly and contain all of the affirmations I’ve created for you to access anytime you want!

Self-care for parents
Posted inWell-Being

How we as parents can maintain self-care during lockdown

Daily self-care is mandatory – let me start with that.  No matter your circumstances, self-care practices contribute to your overall sense of well-being.  And as I mentioned in Why Your Well-Being Matters Most Right Now, practising self-care needs to factor as a top priority. 

However, when you’re looking after your kids at home, self-care – for parents, in particular – can easily fall to the bottom of the priority pile.  As a parent, I completely get that.  My kids’ happiness & well-being is the most important thing to me.   But I’m also acutely aware neglecting my needs will inevitably negatively impact not just me, but my kids too.  

With this is in mind, let’s look at how we as parents (or caregivers) can continue to practice self-care…

Why your well-being matters most right now
Posted inWell-Being

Why your well-being matters most right now

My policy is not to get swept up in or contribute to negative situations.   What I’ve realised is that it’s kind of unavoidable at the moment.  

Whenever I write for this site, I always ask – is this helpful? – only posts where I can answer, yes, get published.  That has always been my commitment to you.  I didn’t want to add to the current noise out there and planned on not writing anything about current events.  However, I’ve decided I do have something helpful to say about the new big ‘C’*.  So I’m sharing this from a place of helpful intention in the hope it will at least provide some support to someone in need of it right now.  

*(who knew how many awful words could be attached to this one letter?)

Let me share with you what I’m personally experiencing at the moment (because we’re all in this together aren’t we)…

In all honesty, my mental health has been impacted.  The news is overwhelming.  I’m human, prone to anxiety and this is certainly spiking it – maybe you can relate?  The majority of my family live in Malta.  With the island’s 14-day quarantine on arrival, I’m no longer just a plane ride away from them, it’s a horrible feeling – I can’t be there if I’m needed.  There is worry for loved ones who fall into the higher-risk category & concern for friends whose livelihood is in pieces right now.   It’s a giant unwelcome feeling of no-control.  Life on hold, for who really knows how long.  Seriously, f*@k you Corona! 

But here’s what I do know…

The thing that keeps me going – other than my need to function for my kids – is working daily on my well-being.  Now more than ever, simple, daily, easily accessible practices provide the biggest payoffs in terms of how happy I – we – can feel in this moment.  OK, I can’t control what this bloody thing is doing, but I can control what I do to get myself through it – so can you.

Right now, I want to share with you my well-being daily action list

I know you may have heard a lot of this before, but the more times we hear something the more likely it sticks.  Please do not underestimate how much these simple actions can help when it comes to looking after your well-being during lockdown.

Tips on looking after your well being during lockdown: