From lost to found: How to find what you’re looking for

From lost to found

I have this great little sheer black camisole top that is an absolute staple in my wardrobe.  It goes with so many things and is a mandatory requirement in the make-up of a lot of my outfits.  A new day dawned and another opportunity arose to wear said camisole.  But it was nowhere to be seen.  There ensued manic searching of my wardrobe rails but to no avail. 

As the weeks went by, I extended the search to include all the drawers, the laundry bin, the ironing basket, under beds, suitcases, under tops that I usually wear it with.  EVERYWHERE.  Where was this bloody top?  Unfortunately I reached the point where I had to begrudgingly accept it was lost and went out to purchase something as similar as I could.  The next day I was putting on the new cami and as I went to pull another item from my wardrobe, what literally fell at my feet? the top I had been searching for.   

Have you had something similar happen to you? 

It happens to me quite a lot.  Usually something pretty mundane, like the other morning when I couldn’t locate my deodorant, again a round of frantic searching, then accepting (and resorting to using the husband’s) before immediately seeing it right in front of me – even though I swear I looked in that exact place not five minutes beforehand.  

My Gran used to say naughty pixies were at play.  All you needed to do was stand where you were, calm yourself and say aloud ‘OK very funny, you got me, I’ll have it back now please’.  Then usually not long after the missing item would re-appear.  I would just like to take a moment to admit that it wasn’t ‘naughty pixies’ at play when the chocolate would go missing from the shoebox she kept it in – that was me.  Sorry Gran!  

OK, so this is all small fry, but it’s happened on some big things for me too…

For example, years ago, after having my heart-broken a couple of times, I remember a telephone conversation with my mother, where I uttered the now infamous last words ‘That’s it Mum, I’ve had enough, no more boyfriends for me for a very long time.’  Only to go out with my girlfriends that evening and meet the man I would end up marrying.  This is not an uncommon story.

How often have you heard similar stories?

Couples who had difficulty conceiving and when they took the decision to stop trying, soon after discovered they were pregnant.  Or the entrepreneur pen in hand, ready to sign the bankruptcy documents only to have an investor show up at the last minute with the required capital to keep the business going.  

It’s almost as if, by placing our focus on one of lack or loss we’re blocking the entry – or re-entry – of the things we want in our lives.   To me, it seems the moment when you let go and just accept something is – for the moment – how it is, it’s pretty much the time the thing you want, or need, falls into your lap.

Don't try to pull open the flower. It all blooms according to plan. Breathe, relax, stay the course and lighten up! Jen Sincero quote graphic

I feel I need to be very clear here that the message being given isn’t to give up! 

Life will present you with problems, but it will also gift you answers.  To attain them, you have to employ some patience and be open to receive.  Trying to exert too much control and not exercising enough patience and faith over a situation will block you from uncovering the solutions.

Recently I was discussing a game I play with my children, called ‘hidden in plain sight’.  It’s a really simple game where I show the kids an item (usually a rubber duck or a teddy) and then place it somewhere in the house, but not hidden – in plain sight.  The winner is whoever finds it first.  Sounds easy doesn’t it?  Try it for yourself, it might surprise you.   My description of this game was met with mocked scoffing – especially from the husband – who I believe may have inwardly started to question the intellectual capability of the kids.  But who then walked straight past our daughter’s bunny, which I had placed in ‘plain sight’ for him to pick up to take to her.  Not so silly now, hey? 

My point here is that nearly everything we need or want is out there somewhere for us.

You might not find what you’re looking for instantly.  It might not be along the path  you thought you needed to take to reach it.  It might not be discoverable within the time limit you’ve set for yourself.  But it is there.  It will come to us when we are open and it is ready and right.   And you never know, what you actually needed may have been under your nose the whole time.

Want to reap the benefits from improving your active listening skills? Read: Is anybody listening?  How developing active listening skills can improve your life.


Have you ever had something similar happen to you?  We’ve nearly all done the ‘lost the sunglasses before realising they’re on your head’ thing right? I hope you’ve found this helpful in uncovering what you need to do find what you’re looking for.  I’d love to hear your experiences, get in touch via the comments box below!

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